Thoughts on a Library

My life has been crazy the past few weeks. Well... if I'm being honest, my life has been crazy for the past few months, but the craziness has escalated drastically in the past few weeks.

To give a short run down:

I was offered a new, full-time job in Salt Lake City. So I quit my beloved job at the Orem Public Library, started a new job, and moved to Salt Lake. All of this happened in approximately a three week period. Lightening speed.

I have a lot of emotions about this abrupt change in my life; excitement, enthusiasm, anxiety, stress, sadness, eagerness. It's all happened so fast but it's all fallen into place so easily. It feels like the right change for me but it's still a very hard transition.

Oddly enough, the thing I'm most sad about with all of this is having to quit my job at the library.

I LOVE the Orem Library. I always have.

I remember going there on a weekly basis with my best friend, Aimee, and her mom as a kid. Aimee would check out 20-30 books at a time... I would check out one (it's called pacing yourself, Aimee). We would head back to her house and read for hours in her room. Maybe not the typical behavior of 10 year-olds but it worked for us.

As I got older going to the library became a habit of life. Sometimes, as an angsty teenager, I would (ahem) ditch school and go hang out at the library with my friends. We were all about sticking it to the man for the sake of REAL knowledge, yo! It's how I became friends with Jack Kerouac and Ken Kesey.

I have lots of friends who go for drives up the canyon or to the temple when they're feeling upset. I have always gone to the library to calm down when I'm feeling anxious or when I need to work through some emotions. I like to go to the Storytelling Wing and look at the beautiful puppet stage there and think.

So, two years ago when I applied to work at my beloved library (for approximately the sixth time in my life) and they actually interviewed me for a job AND hired me I was overwhelmed with the honor. I could finally work at the Happiest Place in Orem. During my entire time working there I have never had a day when I dreaded coming to work.

To give a small example of how much I've loved working there: in my entire working career I have ALWAYS made sure that I had the day off for my birthday. It you don't know, my birthday is kind of a big deal. I always ensure that I do whatever I personally want to do on that day because it's a holiday all about me and I'm going to celebrate. For the past two years I've gone to work on my birthday because the place I wanted to be was at work.

Why has working at the library been so special for me? There are lots of reasons for that. The people who work there are among the friendliest, most accepting people I have had the privilege of working with. My eyes have been opened to all sorts of books and knowledge I would have never thought to pick up otherwise.

I think the biggest reason I have loved working at the library so much is because I can see that I am making a quantifiable difference in the lives of the people living in the city of Orem.

A library is a magical place. It is the most accepting place in the world. It is a place where thoughts and ideas and opinions can mix together without fear. This is possibly the cheesiest line possible (but it also holds a lot of truth): as long as there are libraries I don't think we have to fear for our future.

Thank you to the Orem Public Library for giving me the opportunity to be with you and get to know your secret inner workings (spoiler alert: librarians use Google just as often as the rest of us). You will always be the standard to which I compare all other libraries to. I wish I could have stayed with you longer but your budget won't allow for my current needs. It's ok though, I forgive you.

No matter where I go or what I do, going to the Orem Library will always feel like coming home.

Reflections on School

I officially graduated from college last month. After nine years, two colleges, and three (very) different majors I've finally joined the masses of underemployed college graduates.

Hurray!

To put it simply, it has been intense. The past five years have been especially harrowing. To give you a sense of just how much work has gone into this I went through my closet and pulled out all of my sketchbooks from my years in the illustration program at UVU....

In case you can't tell, that's 32 sketchbooks.

I also pulled out every assignment, project, and painting I've done over the past 5 years (give or take, since I've sold some of them)...

I didn't bother counting these ones but to give you an idea of how much work that is I know there are over 60 of those small paintings on the top alone.

Needless to say I have dedicated my life to this. Every hour that I haven't spent at work or sleeping has been spent on art. I have sacrificed weekends and every social engagement possible to work on improving my craft. 

Now that school is over I feel tired, worn out, despondent, and slightly terrified. I've come a long way but I still feel under qualified to enter the professional work force. Nevertheless I am excited for what comes next! The great thing about the art world (and probably most decent human beings) is everyone recognizes there is room for improvement and that you don't stop progressing the second you have a diploma in hand.

Recently I've had this terrible feeling that I've digressed as an artist. I've fallen into the especially dangerous trap of comparing my work to other people's work. So it was a bit reassuring to find the very first drawing I did way back in Drawing I during Spring semester in 2011 and compare it with one of the last drawings I did during my last semester. The first one is a tricycle and the last one is a nude figure (fair warning for people that have issues with naked people). It might have been a better idea to compare a figure with a figure but whatever... 

I had TWO HOURS to draw this tricycle and THIS is all I did?!

I took this picture on my phone and had to tilt the camera to get the whole figure in the shot so the proportions are a little skewed.

This blog post is a bit unfocused (this is due in part to fact that I'm also watching the Great British Baking Show) but I'd like to take a moment to sincerely thank everyone for their support during my school days. It has been an arduous journey and I have not always been a pleasure to be around during that time. Thank you for your patience, encouragement, occasional purchases, and love. I'm so grateful to all of my teachers, my friends, my fellow students, and my family. I have learned so much from you and I feel a profound sense of joy to be associated with all of you.

Now... before this starts to sound too much like an award show acceptance speech....

It's time to get back to drawing! 

Much Love;

Virginia May